
Craft Beer Republic
The World Famous Craft Beer Republic!
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Episode notes
Greg and Flex are back, and this time they’ve got a lot to get off their beer-filled chests. Greg’s fresh off a "relaxing" vacation that somehow left him more exhausted than when he left, while Flex can’t get over how some breweries think slapping “world-famous” on their labels makes it true. The guys also dive into some serious topics, like why lazy grammar makes their eye twitch, and how Greg accidentally ordered an IPA that tasted like a Flintstone vitamin—because apparently, nostalgia is now on tap. Plus, the guys take a detour into a ridiculous conversation about Dildo Brewing in Canada, because of course they did. Crack open a cold one and join the fun—you won’t want to miss this!
Beers We're Drinking:
- Flex is drinking Juice Shark from Lion’s Tail Brewing Company, a New England IPA with hints of watermelon, berry, and citrus.
- Greg is sipping on Wowee from Highland Park Brewery, a hazy IPA loaded with Nelson Sauvin hops and gooseberry vibes.
Greg reflects on how his so-called "relaxing" vacation left him more stressed than when he started, while Flex dives into his love-hate relationship with grammar. The guys also take shots at breweries that claim their beers are “world-famous”, and spiral into a wildly entertaining discussion about a little place called Dildo Brewing. And let’s not forget Greg’s unfortunate IPA choice, which left him with some serious childhood vitamin flashbacks—because nothing says craft beer like nostalgia for Flintstones chewables.
Booze News:
- Molson Coors is launching a new line of 8% ABV singles for convenience stores, featuring Topo Chico Max and Simply Spiked Bold.
- The Brewers Association reports that the Midwest saw a 1% decline in craft beer production in 2023, the first dip since 2020.
- Hard kombucha brand JuneShine is introducing a non-alcoholic kombucha line... which pretty much just makes it kombucha, right?
- A Long Island man, arrested for drunk driving, managed to steal a police car while handcuffed and drove it to a nearby cemetery—because why not?
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Flex: Instagram: @flex_me_a_beer
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Instagram: @CraftBeerRepublic
Facebook: CraftBeerRepublicPod
Threads: CraftBeerRepublic
Voicemail: (805) 538-2337
Episode transcript
Automatically transcribed. Some words and names may be inaccurate.
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Welcome in, everybody, to the craft beer republic. Thanks for drinking. Thanks for joining. I am Greg, and that is the hardest football fan I've ever known. That's Flexy. What's up, big fella? It's a big night for me. Big night. Good. Big night. Long night. Hard night. Long. Hard and fun. Real good night. Yeah, good stuff. How are you, though? I never asked how you're doing.
Well, thanks. I'm all right. I'm still recovering. Could be it makes me want to, like, pick up a coke habit every now and then, but other than that, doing all right. And let me correct myself. I'm sorry. I hate when I say you're. Because. I meant your. Because your isn't a word, and your is. And I. I'm not, like, a grammar snob, because I still don't understand the english language fully. You're sort of a grammar snob. But, I mean, you know, the.
The basics. You have a. Like a. You. Your. Your shirt, right? Or something like that. I mean, that got ripped up. Mosh pit. So it's in the garbage. But I did have a. I did have a yore. Y o u re shirt. I like it. Nothing kills me more. Use the wrong people. Use the wrong. Your. The yore, the theirs. Yeah. What's the other? There's one more that really gets me, and I can't think of it right now.
There's one that gets my wife. I can't think of. But I like to say when people still text and they use the letter r instead of the word r and the letter u instead of the word you. Yeah, look, we're not on the little fucking nine key keyboards anymore. Spell the whole world out. Also, learn your forms of two. Yes. You know who's really bad? It's my mom. Oh, man. I thought you were gonna say Shannon. Oh, no, no. Shannon. Her and I are very similar on our grammar nazi ness.
Um, my mom is horrendous. I think part of it is she uses, like, the speech to text, but I'm pretty sure siri fucking hates her at this point. And I'll get these messages, and sometimes I just respond, have you been drinking? You just have to try and decipher them. Yeah, it is possible. When we hear in Portugal, my mom texted me a question about Portugal, asked me to find out what the answer was, and I just responded back with, have you been drinking?
Because I had no idea what her question was. Then, like, two days later, she responded to her own message and was like, don't worry. I googled it. And found the answer. Like, it's a good fucking thing. Because I don't even know what you asked me. That's like, my dad, he'll do the talk to text, but it'll all come out in, like, one run on sentence. Yeah. And then, like, he'll even say laugh out loud. And then it will, like, smell laugh out loud. Not lol. It's. It's the fucking best.
I love when talk to text doesn't quite catch on. And you're reading it, and then it just says, like, spelt out exclamation point. Yeah. I don't understand how talk to text does like. Yeah, like the punctuation. Yeah, yeah. I usually give it punctuation. Yeah. I'll just be like, hi, comma, what is happening tonight? Question mark? I would love to get some beers. Exclamation like, I'll. I'll sit there and sound like an idiot and say it all.
So does it actually work like that? Oh, yeah, yeah. Wow. I mean, that's. That's how I do it. Like, I say all the proper quote in quotes. Proper, you know, grammar thing. I feel like I do that and it just says question mark. Oh, really? You know, with exclamation, there's like, exclamation point and exclamation mark. One's wrong. I think Mark is wrong. Right? Or point is. I don't remember. Anyways, one of them, when you say it, it spells it out and the other one, it does the right thing. Huh.
Is it an exclamation point or an exclamation mark? I think it's point and it's a question mark. Yeah, I think so. Good thing it's not a grammar show. Thank you. Be me to it. Not a grammar show. So we'll move on. But we're not going to move on from following us on the social. Zach raft, beer poke and head flex me fear underscores in between. If you ever want to call us, it's 805538 beer 2337. Shout out to hot Lana for being our top listening city last week.
Yeah. What up, Hotland? Thanks for checking this from maybe. Yeah, it's where the players play. That's what I hear. Yeah, that's. That's what Luda, also Luda, one of my, like, top five favorite rappers of all time. Big beats hit street, see, gangsters, Romande. If anybody says anything about 22, I immediately just go, I can't lose the 22s, bitch. That's what's up. I love that song. So good. All of this shit so good. Anywho, not a ludicrous show.
Well, ludicrous libation. Okay. I like that. All right. All right. We'll see. Anyways, let's mix things up a bit. We're both looking a little sober. Why don't we ask some questions? See what you're drinking over there. Oh, wow. In a world where craft beer is. Kingdom, a world where muscles are bigger. Than growlers, only one tongue can guide us. One man. One tongue. One tongue jobber. In this, licking the microphone must find out what is flax drinking.
Lick it like a lollipop. Alright, so tonight I'm drinking a beer from Lion's tail brewing company. Hmm. And I went out on a limb on this one. Okay. I like these guys. I do. I can't say I don't, because I do. Yeah, you've had them on the show before. Had them on the show before. I buy their stuff, you know, every now and then. But their ipas, most notably, they are very big on naming them juicy Daisy and not
following suit. Right. So I did see them post the spear. I thought, wow, that looks really good. So I bought it, Greg. So this is juice shark. Okay. It is in the name juice, right. Not haze. It's not a Hays shark. It says it is a New England IPA, 6.6% AbV. And they're. They're can art. It's always. It's got their lion logo.
Mm hmm. And it's always got a little bubble. And it works. What I do like about it is they have messy, for me on this backside, it's a little bit. It. It works. But on the backside of the can, it's similar to Drucker where it has the malts. They use the hops they use. So they use pale pilsner, wheat and oats in this. And then the hops are citra. And then. Get this one, Greg.
It's like a coordinates. Got it. 2480 five. That's a hop. Or maybe it's two four b. Yeah, yeah. Two four b zero five. But you can understand a b and an eight looking similar. Oh, yeah. And then they also have another line of information for inspiration. And it says, you're gonna need a bigger boat. Do they use the right your. They did. I was waiting for you to ask. It is y o U.
Fosteriary. Glad to hear it. And then they have this little, uh. It's like this little attribute chart. Oh, yeah. Little flavor chart. Yeah. So it shows, like, tropical, juicy, hazy, dry, dank citrus. So this one has hazy to the max. Juicy to the max. Tropical to almost the max. This shouldn't be a dry beer. It shouldn't be very dank, and it shouldn't be very citrusy. They call those spider charts. Is that right? I don't know, dude.
You're way techie than I am. So untapped has this. So, again, this is a newer beer. 246 check ins on untapped, a collective 3.9, which isn't terrible. No, that's a pretty solid rating. It says brewed to minimize bitterness and maximize juicy hop flavors. From citra and experimental 24 b, zero five hops. Big doses of oats and wheat deliver fluffy mouthfeel and leave a lovely haze.
Notes of watermelon, hard candy, ripe berry, and citrus fruit. You're gonna need a bigger boat. That's what it says. Hmm. So, on the schnoz, let's look for watermelon, berry, and citrus. Okay, I'm looking. I do get a little fresh berry mixed with citrus on the nose. Um, a little bit dank. And then now there's some watermelon coming through. Okay, that's interesting. All right. And it is like. Like a watermelon jelly rancher.
That's kind of crazy. Obviously, the best flavor of jolly ranchers. I disagree, but let me get the tongue jabber warmed up. Okay. So they were right. They minimize the bitterness. There is no bitterness. The juice is not maximized. The flavor is minimal, but it is very minimal. Watermelon and berry.
That's coming through on here. I'm gonna get another sip. Yeah. Go back in for more research. I repeat, there's no bitterness. And the. The juice is not maximized. But those flavors are there, and it's minimal. But this works. And, like, for a 6.6% ipa, it is hazy. I will show you this, too, as well. Can confirm it is a hazy beer. A 3.9.
This is solid. I would not turn this down. I would order this at a brewery. I would drink it if somebody bought it for me. Okay. But the maximize of the juice, I wouldn't put that on there on the label. My biggest. So here's my biggest beef with these guys. I'm going to put this out here. Let's hear it. All of their ipas that they usually come out with are, like, super duper malt forward. So you have to understand, like, real old school.
I am on. Well, even when they're, like, juicy, hazy New England, they claim they're just always very multi. I am beside myself right now drinking this. That is a flavorful, an actual New England IPA, as it says. And do you miss the dank at all? The bitterness? I should say. Not on this. Okay. Not when they say that they minimized it. Like, that's what I'm expecting. Right? So if I got some and they said they minimized it, I would say, well, this is.
You probably figure out what you're doing and then fix it. But this is. I mean, this one is. It is a solid, nice offering. It's not exquisite. It's not phenomenal. It's not great, but is. It is a solid offering. Would drink again, 100%. Would drink again. Maybe. Maybe like a three, seven, five on untapped. Maybe I'd give it. Okay. Which is, again, not terrible. Right. But, you know, four is pretty high marks. I.
Yeah, I definitely wouldn't give this a four. Okay. That's fair. Not. Not to be that guy who talks about his vacation for, like, the next six months or anything like that. You went on vacation? My sister got married. Did. Did you know your sister's pregnant? I'm sorry, what now? I didn't know she was married. And then she's gonna have some. Some bastard kid. She's not even married. What is, like, the big show is she gonna give birth to? Not a wrestling show. Well, okay.
Yeah, I heard. Turns out she's pregnant or something, apparently. Yeah. Slut. Yeah, one at a time. What was it? Oh, not. Not to be the vacation guy for the rest of my life or anything, but I had that issue with most the ipas I had in Portugal. Real malty real, like, you know, here's your loaf of bread with your ipa kind of thing. And not very great, just not for me. They. They really were a little bit weird on all the, like, the loggers and pilsners I had over
there, for the most part, had, like, a real, like, funk to it. Sort of like a farmhouse funk. Interesting. And it's like the logger. It's like this just says lager. You know, give me a nice, clean. You know, I'm thinking german style lager. I wonder why that is, like, what's going on with the brewing process. I don't know. It's like, I don't need your fucking sweat socks in my lager. Unless it's just not very clean. I don't know. Yeah, maybe their water is not the best or something. Water is a big deal when it comes to brewing. I did.
This is gonna make me sound so american. I did Google, like, can Americans drink the water in Portugal? Yeah. You don't. You go to Mexico. You don't drink the water. Right. That's well known. Yeah. So I just wanted to confirm. And first of all, for anybody wondering, you totally can. It's safe, meets all the standards of some european something. But they did say, like, scientific, right? Yeah, it's got a ph level of your mom. Um, they did say that it's not the tastiest water and it tasted whatever.
It didn't taste bad. Local water out here tastes like shit. So I was like, compared to at home, this isn't that bad. But that being said, that might be why their beers have a funk to them or something. There's Santa Monica or Santa Clara that has the best tap water rated in the world, by the way. Really? In California? Yes. Huh. I've some of my favorite California tap water. Google it right now is. I'm gonna do it is mammoth. Mammoth has great tap water. Comes, you know, fucking snow runoff. Sounds delicious.
Yeah. This is not a tap water show, but. Oh, this is an article. Apparently San Francisco gets their water from yosemite, so it tastes really good. Uh oh, here's from this year, Santa Ana tap water named world's best with third gold medal at Berkeley Springs International water tasting. I work. I have a location in Santa Monica or Santa Ana, so I should drink the water next time I'm down there. Apparently I was close. It was a Santa. Yeah, one of the. There's half the cities in California are Santa's, so you. It gets confusing.
There's a Santa. Santa Claus, Indiana, or something like that. Or Santa, Indiana. I don't know, Zach. It's like a whole. No, it's like a whole Christmas themed town. Like, I'm telling you, like, they have it. Not unlike Dildo Canada. Yeah. No, yeah. It's like, if dildo was Christmas, like. That'S how great would it be if the light posts and everything in dildo Canada were valid dildos? Yeah.
Just fake dicks with light bulbs. Yeah. I was telling somebody at work about that place and they're like, that's not real. I said, no, it's a real place. And I google mapped Dildo Canada and it fucking came up. You could show them dildo brewing. I mean. Well, that's what I was. So that's how the conversation started. Telling them all about the dildo stout or stout Dildo and all the other obnoxious names that they come out with that they just play off of. And I wish they'd take it like, a step further to where, like, you know, the stout.
The Dildo stout would be like, you know, come get a big dark dildo. Something like that, you know, too far maybe. It's kind of Vince McMahon. Ooh, that's gross. I'll see myself out. Not a Vince McMahon. Nope, nope, nope. I am surprised Deb hasn't moved to Dildo Canada yet, though. Ah, she's more about the real dicks. That's true. Fake dick. That's true. So, all right, this was like a good point to move on. Stop talking about Dick's real or fake. Hey, can I complain about some beer, please?
Okay, went to. What kind of beer is it? Gross beer. Went to lazy dog. You guys have lazy dog restaurants out there? No. All right. It's kind of like a BJ's type of place. Sign me up. The restaurant, not the, nevermind, not the 38 seconds of pleasure food and beer. And they have a craft beer club and they have forget who it is nowadays. Melvin Brewing, I think does their beer club beers or something like that.
And they also will bring in other breweries to do special one offs. A few months ago, Monica over at Petalse did a collaboration with lazy dog. It was in all their restaurants. And anyways, so that part of it's cool. They cater to people with dogs. They have like a dog menu. If you have dogs, you can sit outside. That didn't even cross my mind. I'm gonna tell you, first of all, we never buy marty. It's like, I'm not paying $10 for a fucking chicken breast and rice, asshole. Enjoy your kibble.
Also, he can't eat that shit. It'll make him sick. But, um, God dang it, his food, so goddamn, I wish it was like $10. Anyways, went there, had a little dinner, had some beverages. One of their core beers is an IPA. It's called huckleberry Hayes. And that's all it said. Okay, and it was an IPA. And you know, the ABV. All right, I will take a huckleberry haze. I thought it was just a cute alliteration, a little play on words. All right, well, apparently it's fruited.
Did not say it was a fruited IPA. And it tastes like a fucking flintstone vitamin. Ooh, what color? The gross red raspberry one. Oh, I was a big fan of the orange and the purple. All right, well, whatever the worst Flintstone vitamin is is exactly what it tastes like. Man. Sometimes I would eat two Flintstone vitamins in the morning. I love the vulgar thing. Maybe I need a huckleberry IPA.
Maybe you do, because I got that thing and I smelt it I was like, oh, this isn't promising. And then I tasted it, and I was like. I plugged. I fucking plugged and chugged. It was so great. I handed it to Shannon. I said, hey, correct me if I'm wrong, is this a Flintstone vitamin? And she agreed with me. And then I plugged in chugged because it was so gross. Yeah, no joke. I sometimes used to sneak a Flintstone vitamin before my mom would get downstairs, and then she would come downstairs and give us all vitamins so that I would get two.
And I love them so much. And I love the way they taste. I love everything about them. By the way, that story was from a week ago. It's not from when he was a kid. Oh, dear. That's pretty accurate. But anyway, so all this to say, fuck you, lazy dog. If you're gonna have a fruited ipa, put next to it that it's, like, fruited or supposed to taste like huckleberry or something. I'll agree to that because it was fucking disgusting. The other thing, and this is not lazy dog, this is a brewery.
They put world famous next to one of their beers. I can confirm with you it's not world famous. You can't just put world famous next to. Should we start calling ourselves the world famous craft beer republic and just see if it catches on, you know, what's world famous like? Like Budweiser. I would say that's pretty world famous. Yeah. I mean, we are popular in Finland. John Travolta. I'd say that's pretty world famous. Yeah, I can agree with that. Lazy dog beer. I haven't heard of him.
In Wisconsin. Right? Not world famous. No, apparently not even us famous, but that's my point. Yeah. Can't go world if you can't complete the whole us. Right? Exactly. So anyways, this is not lazy dog, but is that a brew? He's like, they're world famous. Blah blah, blah iPa. I was like, what? Wait, it was just at a random brewery? Yeah. Oh, that's even more obnoxious. Yeah, yeah. It was world famous. And it was one of their beers. I was like, no, that works, homeboy. You don't just slap world famous on there. And so it becomes.
Right, like, it's gotta be pretty renown. Yeah, worldly renown. World renowned. There you go. And if it's not, then you're a liar. Yeah, I wouldn't even say it's local famous. So anyways, stop putting world famous next to shit. Doesn't mean it's world famous. Unless we're the world famous craft beer republic. Finnish famous. Right. What about South Korea? European famous. Yeah, barely. Like a small section of Europe.
Romania. Yeah. Start calling it the world famous tongue jobber. Yeah. I mean, I don't see why that can't play out. Sure. We should make a shirt just as world famous tongue jobber. Nothing else. I wonder how that would do about. As well as all of our other shirts. And then get another shirt that says zungen jobber. Translate world famous into German. World famous. Zungenjammer. Just put a v instead of a. W.
Didn't that just make it german? I'm pretty positive, yeah, we've offended all two german listeners. So change the w to a v and the o, two u, and it works out of. Yeah. Put like an umlat somewhere. Yeah, yeah, we'll be good. Yeah, yeah. It's the only german word I know. Umlaut. Yeah, yeah. Guten tag. Yeah. I know how to say beer in German. Beer. Beer. Yeah. Yeah. Got that far. Beer.
Beer. Yeah. All right, let's move on to some things. You know what? I'm feeling a little thirsty over here. Yeah. Are you thirsty? I am quite thirsty. You look thirsty. You sound thirsty. I can hear it in my voice. It's a little scratchy. It's a little vacationy. Yeah. Let's make a call. He calls to the bullpen for beer. Yes, he does. All right. I am drinking Highland park breweries. Wowee.
Hazy ipa. Wowee woweed. What a can, right? A lot of. Lot of colors and things happening. 7.3%. A four oh six on a random. Ass abv, by the way. 7.3. Yeah. Yes. With over 1300 ratings, it says hazy ipa hopped with 100%. Nelson Sovin hops. Nice. I knew you'd get hard over that one hazy beer that bursts with aromas of gooseberries.
Smell the gooseberries. I was just going to say the gooseberries taste like gooseberries, tropical fruits. And the white wine and the white grape or whatever. Oh, man. Nelson. Good thing you got that fresh box of Kleenex with you. Give me all the Nelson. The schnoz. I'm really picking up the grip. It's a very light smell altogether. But what I do get is that grape, that white wine grape smell.
Heck, yeah. Anzi zungan jabba. I can tell you what. When you taste something and you're not sure what it is, that is the gooseberry. Then I'm getting a little bit of gooseberry, more of that. That grape, that white wine grape. Okay. And pretty soft mouth feel. Certainly does not drink like it's over 7%. Feels real light. Little effervescence in there. I will say.
Not always a fan of the Highland park beers. I've had a few. They've been, you know, probably 50 50 hit and miss. But this one I'm actually enjoying. I believe this one came to me from not murderer John. Okay. I hear he hasn't murdered anybody at this point. Still holds up to the name. It's unreal. Yeah. Which I'm one streak, you know. He'S really put one together there for still.
Out there, not murdering people. Right. Shit's good on him. Yeah. Good, autumn. So, yeah. Good. Keep it up. Yeah. Keep that streak alive, please. For me, especially. Right, exactly. So. All right, let's get a little news going before we get out of here. The brewers association reports that the Midwest area has recorded production declines across all classes of beer.
Overall, craft volume declined 1% in 2023, the first year output was down other than 2020. Can I interrupt you for a second? Yes. You just reminded me of something. When you said the Midwest, and I meant to. I meant to get on this after my St. Louis trip back in July. My memory is just so bad. I feel that St. Louis is considered a Midwest state. Let me just put this out here. Well, the whole city is considered a state. Or Missouri.
I'm sorry? Missouri is considered a Midwest state. You got me. Two out of every three people has, like, a southern accent. How was that a Midwest state? That is weird. It doesn't make sense. Yeah. If everyone's walking around with southern accents. Kills me. Yeah, it's like the most non midwest Midwest state. And it's, you know, it's middle. Low middle. Let me pull up a map here. I mean, it's pretty middle.
It's like the shirt of the soldier, you know, that runs down the middle of the country. It's like, minnesota, Iowa, Missouri. Yeah. What is it? What is. What's under. Is it Arkansas, Arkansas, and then Louisiana? Right? Yeah. I mean, like, it is a state above Arkansas. Yeah, it's pretty midwest in location. Well, it's pretty mid. Mid. Yeah, well, that's the other thing. First of all, the Midwest thing is so dumb. I don't even know how it got that name. I don't know. Because, look, we're the west.
It's California west. You know, I'd say west. You could stretch into, like, Utah kind of thing. Maybe you can color around. I was thinking Colorado. All right? I mean, Colorado's fairly middle of the country, but. All right, we'll give it Colorado. Then you have the midwest after that. Why isn't that the mid. Why is it the midwest? You don't have a mideast. I don't know where that drive from. I really don't. It's fucking dumb. But I tell you what, we really own it here in Wisconsin.
Oh, I know. And. And I'm not mad at the Midwest Persona or lifestyle or whatever. It's just the name is really dumb. Definitely a lifestyle. Thank you for that. Yeah, it really is. But it should just be the mid. Not the midwest. I don't know. Or, like the north. Like, we should at least be like the north. Mid north. Mid north. That would make more sense. It would make so much more sense. Yeah. Maybe it should be left to right, so mid, and then up and down.
North. South, whatever. So, like, we would be southwest in California. Why is New Mexico the southwest? Yeah, it's barely west. It's pretty middle, isn't it? Like bottom. Bottom of the. Yeah, it's south. Correct. It should be like South Midlandhouse, but it's pretty blast. Yeah, I'll disagree with you on that one. Okay. Or mid. Mid south. I don't know. You know. Still sucks, though. What's that? Alabama? Yeah, absolutely. Roll, Ted.
Hey, you know what? Not a. Not a map show. Not. Yes. Anyways, you know, we put it out there. Yeah. We gotta learn you something. So, Midwest, do you say. Do you say pop? Oh, soda. Okay. What do you. You say pop, right? No, we're. So. Wisconsin says soda. All the surrounding Midwest states are like, pop. Oh. I had never even heard pop until I was, like, a teenager. I was like, wait, somebody said pop. I was like, what is that? Like, pop rocks. It blows my mind, you know, like a coke.
I was like, soda. Do you say drink? Do you say drinking fountain versus water fountain? Yeah. Um. Oh, I kind of. I think they're a little interchangeable. Well, trick question. Could we call them bubblers here? Oh, okay. Yeah. So that a bubbler is a device for smoking weed? Yep. Nope. It's what you drink out of. No, it's what I. What I smoke weed out of. I've never heard of that.
It's like a bong and a pipe mixed together. It's like a small, tiny little bong. It's got a little bit of water in it. It's kind of cool. I haven't used one since high school, but, yeah. I mean, I've never used one. Not a bubbler show, right? Oh, here we go. In the story of what and why June shine adds what? Non June shine kombucha. Hard kombucha. Gross. That's why. I don't know. Well, hard kombucha brand adds a line of non alcoholic kombucha to their profile.
Doesn't that just make it kombucha? That just makes it kombucha. You're right. Which usually, if I'm not mistaken, on the label, always has a less than 1% alcohol. Oh, really? On the label, I believe there's some amount of fermentation that, like, it has to have that. Oh. Makes a little bit of sense, but na kombucha sure doesn't. That's just fucking kombucha. Dumb as fuck. Yeah. That's the dumbest shit I've ever heard of. Molson Coors is gonna launch a trio of 8%.
Hey, I bought some non alcoholic milk at the store today. Oh, just get regular milk. No, this is not alcoholic milk. It was na. Hey, I picked up some na. Pop. Gross. Long as I'm na. Dasani water. Gross. Don't say pop. I felt weird saying it, I'll be honest. Might be the first time it felt gross. It made me throw up. Na soda, mostly. Curious to launch a trio of 8% abv singles for convenience stores, the company availed a
trio of 8% abv brands, playing off of the brand equity of its flavor, of its craft and flavored alcoholic beverages. Blue moon extra, simply spiked, bold and topo chico. Max. Okay. Had you with that one, huh? I do like the top of margs. Yeah, that's it. Vanessa got fucked on those. Yeah. She believe she said she passed out in her pool.
Yeah, something like that. Yep. Yeah. Good times. Haven't been drunk like that in a long time. Same USP's they have reintroduced a shipping equity act, and they're basically. They're trying to change the law so we can ship beer. They did this, like, a year ago. We talked about it, and it just never went anywhere. They tried it a couple years before that, and it got turned down in Congress, so it's being brought back to legislation. Let's fucking do it. Guys, I know I've talked about this a couple of years ago.
So when you send beer, I don't know what you ever send beer through? Is it post office or USP's or, I'm sorry, Ups or. I don't send beer, but if I were to, it would probably be ups. Okay, so when you take a package to the USP's and you got the whole little screen thing and you're checking off everything. It's not. Oh, kiosk. Yeah, right.
That's the word I was looking for. They're like, are you aware you can't ship alcohol and this and that? And perfume? Which blew my mind that you can't. Ship perfume even because it's flammable. And then they say mercury comes up there, like, no shit. Thermometership. Mercury. I just thought to myself, what about Uranus? Damn it. Oh, did I steal your joke? No. Okay. I'm just thinking myself. I just pissed because I was good.
Who the fuck doesn't know that they can't ship mercury, right? Like, it must be a thermometer thing. Like, people were shipping thermometers with mercury in them. But why? Like, I don't know. Who needs that many thermometers? Need to know each room of the house. I don't know. It just blew my mind that they're like, hey, dumb shit, I hope you're not shipping mercury. I might be like, it's a pretty volatile element, so.
Yeah. Well, anyways, this law has been around since prohibition, and they're looking to repeal it, and it's about goddamn time. What if it passed? It should pass. Well, I. Well, I'm. I know. I'm just saying, what if it did? Then people can chip booze. Legally? Legally. Now, it's not really geared at individuals. Well, may or may not send beer to each other, but. But it is geared towards, you know, like, breweries being allowed to ship their own beer and that stuff.
But it would still be make it legal, right? Yeah. It doesn't mention idiots like us sending beers. Like, I would probably ship beer way more often. No, you wouldn't have. Yeah, I would. Yeah. It's more of, like, a freak legality thing for me. Illegal, I guess. Not that I'd ship any beer, but if I did, I would use a UpS because there's no legal ramifications. They just steal your beer. They just steal your beer, throw it away.
So they have stolen my beer before. I know. That's why I said that. Yeah. And kept it. And then apparently they just wanted the anagran. They sent the rest. That's right. So weird. I'll never forget that. They know they took an Enneagram nighthawk, and they wrote on there. They even wrote that not only did it explode, but they wrote which beer exploded on, like, the reason for delaying or whatever. Finally sent it on its way. And when the person received it, there was no evidence of a very dark beer exploding in the
box. Maybe they repackaged it, maybe, and cleaned it all up. Here's the thing. I put everything. I put all the beers in a Ziploc. Not that I ship beers, but if I did, I put them all in. I only hear this story, like, every 14 months. Yeah, you get like once a year or so. And then inside of a. Or outside of the ziploc, I put all the ziplocs wrapped in a trash bag. It's like the chances of a beer exploding, and then you put it all. In a trash bag. Yeah. So ziplocs, then trash Baghdad.
That's. That's pretty genius. I mean, not that I should be, but if I were to. So the chance of it exploding and then leaking to the outside are like, zero to zero, zero to 1%. There's no way that fucking nighthawk from here to San Diego, like, I could walk it there in a day. The three hour drive, there's no way in that amount of time it exploded. I don't know. I worked at FedEx for ten months and tell you, people don't handle packages as carefully as
they should. Oh, I'm fully aware that everything's being thrown at all times, but I. Of all the beer packages, that's the one. Thrown is the right word. Despite skipped. Skip rocks on a. On a lake or something? That's kind of like that. Yeah. All right. It makes sense. All right, let's end it on this one. Not all the crazy people have to live in Florida.
A handcuffed Long island man steals a patrol car after a drunk driving arrest. A 37 year old man was pulled over by state troopers around 05:30 a.m. last Friday on suspicion of driving under the influence. After failing a sobriety test, he was arrested, handcuffed, and put in the back of a police vehicle. While officers weren't looking, the man managed to slip his handcuffs to the front and free himself from the seatbelt. He climbed into the front seat of the patrol car and drove off from the scene.
The car was later found about 3 miles away, while the man was then located in a nearby cemetery. He pleaded not guilty on Friday to charges that included grand larceny, criminal possession of stolen property, unauthorized use of a vehicle, use of a vehicle, and driving while intoxicated, and other charges. How do you plead? Not guilty. That shit, I'm sure it's on their. On their dash cam. I don't wait. Like, waiting in the cemetery. Being found in the cemetery. That's weird.
And some undertaker shit, like, maybe he's. Just waiting to die. Oh, wow. Took a turn. No, super turn. Like you cranked that wheel all the way. All the way to the left. So anyways, fucking weird supes. Supes weird. All right, let's, uh. Let's wrap things up. Let's. Let's do it. You know better. I'm gonna hit some music. Thank you all for hanging. Thanks for listening, all that shit.
Follow us on the socials at crack beer, Pokemon, sweepie. So sweepy time for Betty. Bye. And at Flexmetbeer, underscores in between 80553 beer. 2337. Mail at craftbeer, pokemon.com. don't forget craft beerhog.com. algorithm. No why in algorithm. Don't forget that either. Zero. Why? Zero wise. I think that's everything. Hope everyone is staying very well hydrated. And on that note, good night, everybody.
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